Let Santa know that I tried to be nice
At this time of year, naughty or nice is the topic of conversation at the Parsonage dinner table.
I should just let it out’s not my #1 discussion since what is shrewd, and what is great? That all relies upon who you’re conversing with. These terms are interpreted differently by the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage than I do.
My wife says that good things have to do with broccoli and bad things have to do with apple fritters.
I’m afraid I have to disagree with this because, in my opinion, good things have to do with apple fritters and bad things have to do with broccoli. You can’t get any naughtier than broccoli, in my opinion. I can’t at least.
However, at this time of year, an overweight man living in the North Pole who abuses reindeer sets the standard for what constitutes naughty and nice. You don’t know me if you think I’ll listen to his definition.
Because I don’t trust that man, I don’t want Santa to decide whether I’m nice or naughty.
Why should I trust a man who only works one day a year and lives in the North Pole the rest of the time? He is nearly as bad as politicians, but not quite. However, at least Santa works one day a year.
“So, do you think you’ve been nice this year?” my wife asked.
As a husband for nearly 50 years, I am familiar with a trick question. I can’t tell you how many times one of these questions has fooled me.
I mumbled, “Well, how do you think I fared throughout the year?”
I was available to return it on her shoulders and let her disappear with it. My wife is an expert in many things, especially conducting interviews. I am an expert in unsuccessful interrogations.
My life has taught me that what other people think, especially about me, is more important than what I think. It’s not whether I thought I was nice last year; rather, did my wife think I was nice?
She said, “Well, there was that incident at the beginning of the year about a lizard on my pillow,” looking very thoughtfully, as she usually does when questioning me.
I couldn’t contain myself from laughing. I vividly recall that incident in a St. Augustine motel. That lizard staring at my wife is still visible to me.
I explained, “You have to admit that lizard was rather a nice little critter.”
She insisted insistently, “If that’s your definition of nice,” “then you have failed the test.”
I wouldn’t say this out loud for her to hear, but I enjoyed failing that test.
“Then there’s the incident about the bug on my leg while I was driving,” she said after a brief pause.
I tried to keep my laughter to myself, but it was out of my control.
“So, do you think it was nice that that bug was on my leg, which caused me to hit the car in front of me?”
I had almost forgotten that, but the incident did not result in any harm.
“What’s the connection between nice and the kind of bug on my leg?”
Then, to my surprise, she also started laughing.
What is nice to some people is not nice to others. What someone else considers to be naughty may not necessarily be naughty.
I had nothing to do with any of the things she pointed out to me. It was something that happened without my permission. I was having a good time and laughing about the incident for weeks to come.
I finally asked my question as the room quieted down.
“So, do you think you’ve been nice this year?” I asked.
Now that the situation was different, I wanted to press her with some of my questions.
I’m not a very good questioner, especially when it comes to my wife’s issues. However, since she brought the topic up, I decided to pursue it and see where it led us.
“I think I have been overly nice because I have given you so much material to write about,” she said after spending some time staring at me. She then gave me one of “those glares” as she glared at me.
At first, I wasn’t sure how to handle it. I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to handle the fact that her NICE was turning into her NAUGHTY.
She then burst into laughter after a brief period of silence. To put it mildly, I was relieved.
We were able to laugh together for a short while, which greatly brightened our day. Another good thing about our relationship came to mind as I was thinking about it.
Fortunately, my wife is not a writer; otherwise, I would have problems.
Sometime thereafter, I thought about the Good book refrain. ” But “the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin” if we walk in the light, as he does, and have fellowship with one another.
The Lord Jesus Christ, our Savior, is the foundation of our relationship rather than good or bad behavior.
Dr. James L. Snyder lives in Ocala, Florida, with the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. He is the pastor of the Family of God Fellowship.
